Chick-fil-A Grilled Egg White and Cheese English Muffin, French Vanilla Ice Coffee Review

Chick-fil-A Grilled Egg White and Cheese English Muffin, French Vanilla Ice Coffee Review


WADDUP!!!! It's yours truly Lost Thoughts here by way of gps! How y'all living? Nah! you know I don't give a f@$#! Anyways, I'm here today to give you a quick review of the breakfast joint I had the other day from God's greatest gift to fast food, the angry, sinner hating, prayer slinging, doing bad by doing good, Chick-fil-A. 

Black folks be frontin like they aight but they aint Popeyes or nothin'. They cool and all but they kinda dry. They aint drippin' heart attack juice like Churches or Lousiana, and they aint eeeeextra crispy like KFC. Blah Blah Blah! Chick-Fil-A is off the M@$&*# F$*(@_@*g chain bruh. 

But this aint a discussion about morals, grease, religion, or lgbt rights. This is simply a talk about a sandwich i wish I got to try. Why? because look at the damn picture y'all!!!


Now you tell me. Does dis bish right here look grilled to you? Did these sumbishes put a fryin pan on the grill and fry my sh!t? Did I sound black or fat on the muffa fuggin speaker so they assumed my fat ass wanted some fried heart stopper cheesy ish like this. This is like when you order steak well done and the waiter bring you a freshly butcher cut t-rex snack. Then the chef like nah playa, this is how i cooks my steak, so this is how you finna eat it bro. Like dog. Why on the Fukc would I want egg whites on fried chicken? You might as well have just went all out, throw on some egg yellows and bacon and call it a morning. 

I know you're probably thinking, why you ordering that booshie mess anyways. Man I dunno! Maybe a big brutha just wanted to do a lil diet for breakfast if that's ok with yo lil skinny ass! 

Anyways. Once i ripped that gross as egg white death outta there, this sandwich was bomb as f@$&! No joke, that b!tch was exquisite, my ninja. It was delightful delicacy of endless flavor, savory to the palate. But, I aint order that mess. I don't even think this joint is on the menu. Them little salty ass hash browns with that portable catchup bottle they give you, did wonders for my blood pressure. 


On to the drank! First off. Everyone already knows Simply Orange is made from Jesus-picked, perfectly ripened naval heaven oranges, hand-squeezed by angels directly into perfectly curved bottles of love and goodness. 

Now this ice coffee though! Well it depends on how you like your coffee. Back in the days when they aint have no Starbucks in the hood (San Bernardino) so you had to go to Rancho or Riverside when you finally could afford a $8 venti, I used to drink my coffee 1/4 sugar, 1/2 cream, 1/4 coffee. You know back when bishes brought they lil Starbucks cups to the adult school because they thought it looked cute, til they had to skip lunch because they aint have no money left. 

Well now that I have four kids. My coffee gotta be black on black on black like crime in the hood. My coffee gotta be so black its life matters. My coffee gotta be so black Yo Gotti wont drink it. Bruh I'm talkin so black, it won gold in the Olympics in the 10k. Man my coffee so black you can see it on Whoopie's gums.

Today tho, I was like lemme get a lil flavor. I be forgetting I'm lactose intolerant. I used to think the coffee was making me blow up public restrooms but nah, it was all that creamer. Today i didn't care. I know they don't put no sugar if you don't ask so i asked for a lil french vanilla. I later gang banged on the work toilet but it was worth it. 

Over all I give them a 3.5 for this lil meal. They lucky though, I probably woulda gave them a 1 for that healthy ass shit I order if they got it right lol.

YO!

Thanks for reading!

-Lost
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